Non é o que parece

I notice it first whilst I’m drilling. I’m running through past simple and past particles and the harmonic energy is good. But that’s not what I’m noticing. My body is swaying. Subconsciously.

Somehow, in the midst of the early May heat, and despite the mild greenhouse effect that Calasancias school generates, my body still feels the need to move. There’s a rhythm is this class. It’s grown organically. I didn’t foresee it and now I’m not sure whether I can stop it. But there’s more to this. They’re doing the same. Facing me is wall of bobbing pale blue uniforms. At first I’m uncertain if they’re just mocking me or whether somehow, in this absurd moment, we’ve entered into some type of hypnotic and quirky routine. I listen for a faint snigger or cackle. Nothing.

I begin to monitor my gestures. They’re small, hesitantly subtle and definitely nothing dramatic. I decide to go bolder. I flick my leg out a little to the left. They follow my movement. I observe their faces. Amused expressions – they’re hooked, they’re into this and it’s not just me. I worry I may become transfixed with this power. They seem to mimic any movement that I do.

I can’t remember if this is something I’ve witnessed before in my teaching practices but damn it, I’m here, I’m enjoying it and they seem to be as well. I decide to raise the volume of my voice. One way or another I think this will inject a new level of enthusiasm into our choreography. It works. Now the mannerisms get bigger. I’m waving, gesturing wildly with my hands and now we’ve finally all synchronised.

There’s a moment when I forget what it is I had actually planned for this lesson, but I push that thought aside and continue. I hush my voice, and they hush theirs. I say a word and they repeat it. The beat continues. We’re making music or maybe it’s art. I’ll probably never know. My mind drifts – I’m thinking Sadler’s Wells and Wayne McGregor.

Unexpectedly, insecurity grapples me. Is this really how these kids are going to remember how to pronounce their set list of verbs? It’s all gone lucid and very David Lynch. I lose myself in this dilemma and our synchronisation stutters. I stare down at my verb list, in the same instance clamber at identifying movements that might invoke the correct verb. I’m all over the place and stumbling. Yet, I don’t think they’ve cottoned on. I’m bluffing well. I make a final effort to make body action equal verb but it doesn’t quite come off.

But by now it’s too late. We’re at that bit in the Thriller music video where Michael Jackson is dancing with the zombies. We’ve all committed to this eccentric and peculiar performance. And there is no stopping it. Not a chance. So, when I eventually arrive at the final verb, the only sensible thing is to start it all over again.

Regrettably there were no other teachers, video evidence or witnesses to this event other than myself and class Quinta A.

Some things go viral, other things just work out perfectly.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sOnqjkJTMaA